Published on Wednesday, 24 September 2014 00:00
If you are secretly worried about your obsession to smartphones, we have the cure for you! Introducing the NoPhone, it is the perfect smartphone placebo that looks and feels exactly like a smartphone with a good weight to it but it does completely nothing at all. It is just a block of plastic that you can carry around in your hand or pocket to fool yourself.
The NoPhone is currently a prototype that will cost just US$12 once it hits the market. But in order for that to happen, its makers have to raise $30,000 on Kickstarter
in order to cover production and marketing costs. They describe the device as a “technology-free alternative to constant hand-to-phone contact that allows you to stay connected with the real world.”
What the real finished product will look like
I admit that I'm one of the many that has developed a habit of constantly taking my phone out of my pocket to check just for the sake of it. With the NoPhone, that bad and anti-social habit can eventually stop. You don't have to leave your real phone at home. You can always carry along your fully functioning smartphone in a bag and keep your NoPhone in your pocket, and when you realize how stupid you look for perpetually taking out a block of plastic from your jeans just to stare at it, you will gradually stop doing it, that's when you can revert to putting your real phone into your pocket. Besides, this makes a great gag gift for that one infuriating friend whose eyes are always glued to his phone when he is out with you.
Dutch designer Ingmar Larsen, who helped create the NoPhone, said that he conceived the idea as a joke along with his friends Van Gould and Ben Langveld. To their great surprise, the idea received a lot of attention online and people from all over the world started requesting for NoPhones of their own. So that’s when the three friends decided to turn to Kickstarter to fund mass production.
Front of prototype
The NoPhone is 5.5 inches high, 2.6 inches wide and 0.29 inches thick, and weighs between 80 to 100 grams, bringing it quite close to the latest smartphones on the market. It is battery-free, shatterproof, waterproof and doesn't require any system updates. Its specs include it NOT having a camera, NOT being Bluetooth compatible, NOT being able to make calls or texts, but it IS toilet bowl resistant.
“Phone addiction is real,” they insist. “And it’s everywhere. It’s ruining your dates. It’s distracting you at concerts. It’s disrupting you in movie theaters. It’s clogging up sidewalks. Now, there is a real solution.”
Back of prototype
“With a thin, light and completely wireless design, the NoPhone acts as a surrogate to any smart mobile device, enabling you to always have a rectangle of smooth, cold plastic to clutch without forgoing any potential engagement with your direct environment. Never again experience the unsettling feeling of flesh on flesh when closing your hand.”
There is proof that the NoPhone efficiently carries out its intended purpose. Just check out these testimonies by NoPhone users:
1. “With the NoPhone, my eye contact skills have improved 73%.” - Whitney R.
2. “Because of the NoPhone, I haven’t drunk texted my ex-boyfriend in one whole week.” Craig G.
3. “I used to sleep with my phone in my hand, but my night terrors would cause me to hurl it across the room in an unconscious panic. With the NoPhone, I can still enjoy the comfort of holding a phone in my sleep, without waking up to a shattered screen. Thanks, NoPhone.” - David H.
4. “Not a real phone.” - Katie A.
The NoPhone selfie upgrade
The NoPhone comes in two different selections; the standard NoPhone or the NoPhone with a selfie upgrade (at no extra charge). The selfie upgrade enables you to enjoy “real-time” selfies with your friends when they are standing either right behind or beside you with its state-of-the-art mirror sticker! With the NoPhone, you can rest assure that there is no risk of any nude selfies being seen by hackers just as long as the hacker is not standing alongside you.