Gold-Diggers: US$3 Million in Gold Smuggled in Assholes

US$3 Million in Gold Smuggled in Assholes
 
South Korean custom officials have confiscated US$3 million worth of gold bars that nine Taiwanese nationals attempted to smuggle in through their buttholes.
 
Now we are all familiar with people trying to smuggle in drugs and weapons that they shove up their asses. And the fact that we are extremely aware of this smuggling technique makes it very sad indeed. Who even came up with this idea that became so damn popular?
 
Apparently smuggling drugs and weapons into another country through nether regions is too mainstream for these nine Taiwanese guys. 60.75 kilograms of gold were found stuffed up their colon when they tried to enter South Korea. If you divide the gold equally, that’s 6.75kg up in each person’s rectum! Talk about shitting bricks! Huge ones.
 
In what must have been the shittiest day of their lives, the gold bars were extracted by South Korean authorities.
 
Surprisingly, the gold-up-in-ass smuggling operation has happened more than one occasion. The smuggling syndicate is accused of moving the gold through Gimhae International Airport in Busan, South Korea on numerous times. This is the first time that the smugglers were nabbed.
 
The mastermind behind the smuggling of funky-smelling gold bars has been identified as Zhou, a 47-year-old Taiwanese man. Zhou would reportedly recruit his smugglers by offering them a trip to Seoul, the catch is that they would have to carry a shitload of gold up their bottom. After safely touching down, they would then supposedly make their way to a subway station in Seoul where they would dump the goods for another member of the syndicate to collect.
 
Xinhua reported that since May this year, the group is believed to have smuggled gold into South Korea on 11 different occasions by dividing it into 270 bricks of gold, each weighing 225 grams. Well, you know the least they could have done was to shape the gold into something easier to insert; an oblong shape perhaps, rather than stiff rectangular blocks.
 
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