Butthole Swathed in Silk: World’s Most Expensive Toilet Paper

Hanebisho toilet paper
 
If you have no idea what to spend your unlimited fortune on, why not try wiping your ass after you are done shitting with Hanebisho toilet paper? At S$22 a roll, it is the most luxurious and expensive toilet paper in the market.
 
For the rich and the famous who believe that their assholes deserve nothing but the best, this particular brand of toilet paper will not disappoint. It is made exclusively with the highest quality wood fiber imported from Canada, and treated with water from the clearest stream in Japan’s Nyodo River.
 
Hanebisho toilet paper
 
The production process is highly complex and intricate and has to be paid utmost attention to.  Hanebisho toilet paper is dried slower than usual methods so that it turns out soft and fluffy. Temperature and humidity is adjusted for production on a daily basis, so no two days’ production methods are similar. Once the paper is ready, the maker of each roll writes their name and date of production on it, before sending it to the company president for inspection. For the last 10 years, he has tested every Hanebisho roll on his own skin for quality control. After the rolls have been approved by the president, they are then sent to the design department, where “the most fastidious of fastidious artisans” decorate them with intricate patterns in a way that the design remains stylish no matter where the toilet paper is torn.
 
Hanebisho toilet paper
 
The packaging of the rolls is as impressive as the production of the paper itself. Each roll is lovingly wrapped in Tosa Washi (a special Japanese paper from Kochi Prefecture) and packed in decorative boxes inlaid with silver leaf handmade by Kyoto artisans.
 
A set of three rolls will set you back ¥5,000 (S$65), while a set of eight rolls is more value for money at ¥10,000 (S$129). So an individual roll will cost between S$16 to S$22. The Hanebisho website claims that their toilet paper is “the ultimate in softness and Japanese modern design” and upon application will feel “as if your skin is being gently swathed in silk”.
 
Hanebisho toilet paper
 
The rolls are so luxurious that it is fit for royalty. The Emperor of Japan has been using these beautiful works of art to remove any traces of feces from his royal hole for five ongoing years already. When royalty approves of any product, you sure as hell know that it is an awesome product.
 
“I gave my father Hanebisho for a Father’s Day present. He thought the wrapping paper and toilet paper itself were so beautiful he put them on display in the living room! He looked very happy,” one satisfied customer testified.
 
Only 150 of these exclusive rolls are produced a day. So if you have ever wished to feel the gentle caress of angels’ wings on your poop hole, this toilet paper is just for you!
 
 
Information Sources: Fuwafuwa Roll, Oddity Central

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